There is nothing casual about matters of the heart.
Some people may disagree.
But I will propose that until your heart is fully engaged in the extremely personal and emotional bond that accompanies two people in mature love, you cannot truly propose the opposite. Think of your heart as a piece of origami paper.
In the beginning, we all get the same sheet, size and color. As we grow older our “paper” heart begins to change. Young love paints lush, red watercolors. First kisses fold a small corner inwards. Conversations of a future together craft a bowl to hold exciting possibilities. At some point an abstract relationship becomes physical. The folds of your constructed heart become more and more permanent; more difficult to smooth out rough edges. Discomforting when the lush watercolors become harsh mixes of grays blues and even black. The paper becomes worn, cold and inflexible. The shape is no longer beautiful. The process of constantly smoothing out crinkling hearts in an attempt to recapture the portrait that was once so boldly painted vibrantly is futile. Once you adapt yourself to the shapes your heart can be manipulated into, the tears don’t hurt as much.
With every new encounter, you voluntarily rip a little piece off…changing the shape.
What happens to the paper given becomes unimportant. Some partners disregard the paper others hold it close to what is left of their own paper hearts; some put it on a shelf to fold it again later. Casual bends and twists deform and construct unwanted images that leave lasting imprints. Enough time passes and someone is ready to treat your heart like a true artist should, with agile fingers ready to fold and build. Unfortunately, all you have to offer is a modest sliver of paper ripped and trampled black with footsteps from previous carelessness and empathy from those you have exposed and given your tiny pieces of heart away to. And the best you can do is hope this that this person, the one you should have let hold your entire heart, has enough heart left to share a little piece with you.
Written by: Elaina Simon
Owner and creator of LOVED, TM – a clothing company catering to men and women .
Minneapolis native currently residing in the DC Metro Area